Perspective

Every person has a story.  Every situation has many complex innuendos.  Not everyone approaches life from the same foundation.  

I have the privilege to spend several days a week in an afterschool program with an amazing group of kids.  On a coloring page of a lion one day after school, I saw this quote, “Until the story of the hunt is told by the lion, the tale of the hunt will always glorify the hunter.”  -African Proverb

I was struck by this quote at the time and have carried it with me for half a year.  I look at the kids in the program and sometimes find it challenging to consider their choices and direct their behaviors.  In those moments when they are choosing a challenging behavior, I have to pause to understand what is under the behavior… what story do they bring to the moment where that choice is made…  Without the pause, my redirection of the choice could be confused as hostile.  It is possible that a challenging choice is rooted in a complex situation that I don’t have enough information to judge.  In those moments the only choice I have is to lead with grace and understanding, followed by correction and redirection.  The “help me understand” perspective diffuses many potential explosions when dealing with children who are culturally different then me. 

If I approached the kids with an “I am right because I am the adult and you are not” attitude, no one would benefit, relationships would be broken, and my work with kids would be useless.  

The same thing happens in the adult world.  I find myself in situations where one side of the story is shared and harsh judgments are launched at me without ever getting my perspective.  I do keep much of my professional and personal interactions private, so most of the time when people come fishing for information, they will get an “it’s none of your business” response.  But, I would hope that adults would understand that when a story is shared with them, the sharer is always going to make themselves out to be the good guy and the other person to be the enemy.

I’m writing this today to challenge us all in the “help me understand” mindset, even if the answer is none of your business and that is what you are told.  I think it’s important to consider that just like the Hunter only told his side of the story in this Proverb, people who glorify conflict in their conversation with you are merely self-promoting.  You see, the Hunter invaded the Lion’s territory to hunt him.  The Lion had not invited him and was merely reacting to the threat.  

Before coming to conclusions, consider the other side of the story.  Ask the conflict glorifier to “help you understand.”  Help that person see another side.  Stay out of it!  This world will only get better if we all seek to be Peacemakers.  Peace is found in us minding our own business, taking care of what is ours to take care of, and encouraging others to seek peace directly with those they are in conflict with, reminding them that there is another side to the story.

I write this to say that at Louis Manor Strategy, we will seek peace, perspective, and understanding individual journeys that are parallel to reaching the goals of our engagements.  Our approach is “help us understand” the past and what can we co-create to move forward and accomplish our goals.

Remember to consider and understand the Lion’s perspective.  You may find yourself surprised and changed by what you learn.